Thursday, February 12, 2009

"I Don't Even Want to Know 1 Random Thing About You."

It's only been in the last month or so that I have begrudgingly started to slightly enjoy and not severely hate Facebook.


I now understand why some people love it. It's nice to catch up with old friends, find friends you haven't seen in a decade or two, stuff like that.

But I find the "pokes" and the constantly updated status messages inane and highly narcissistic. Especially status messages like...

"Ivan Yakinoff is bummed
cause the line at the bank is really long."



First of all Ivan, I don't give a flying fuck about the line at the bank because I'M NOT THERE. The fact that you're waiting in line doesn't interest me AT ALL. Unless I'm on my way to the bank, and if that's the case, thanks for the heads up.

Secondly, if you tell me every little thing that happens in your life between now and the next time we see each other for dinner or drinks, WE WON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO TALK ABOUT since you've vomited every ounce of your life onto your Facebook page in those damn status messages.

But the latest Facebook trend - - The 25 Random Things - - brings inane narcissism to a whole new level.

Which is why I need this shirt from Despair.com. It says...

"I don't even want to know 1 random thing about you."

I SO need this shirt. In a bad way.

Many thanks to Chris at the always brilliant Slap & Tickle for introducing me to my new favorite t-shirt.

18 comments:

My friends call me Mitzi said...

Oh sugarpants ... does that mean ya won't be pokin' me?

On Facebook, I mean.

yellowdog granny said...

oh shit i hate those pokes and pillow fights and sent a plant to help people in africa or some damn thing...I am always tempted to say something like 'why the fuck am I here on facebook..I'm a 65 year old woman who can't find a shit to give it'....gotta go someone just added me as a friend and i have to go ok them..

Java said...

Nope, don't really do the facebook thing. I have an account, but I removed almost all personal info from it. I use it to check on a couple of other folks who use it a lot, but that's it.

You mean you don't want to know that I've been commando all day?

Prospero said...

I love Facebook and have lots of fun on it, but that fucking 25 Random Things business is the single most annoying thing I've ever seen. I blogged the damned thing on "Rabbit Down the Hole" day and told everybody to go read it there, just so they'd leave me the fuck alone.

Ian FInley said...

Hehe, I'm going to argue Devil's Advocate here. I resisted the Dread 25 for a long time, for the same reasons you've posted, but when i finally gave in, it was actually a catalyst for some useful self-examination, long overdue. Now, that's probably just me, and it probably would have been better to keep such reflections to myself rather than splattering them all over the internet in my typically overwrought writing style... But I'm actually glad i gave into temptation this once. Heh. I say that like giving in to temptation isn't something I enjoy. Hah.

Palm Springs Savant said...

I too, find FB strangely alluring yet incredibly boring at the same time. I have reconnected with a few old friends, but after the first few exchanges, I've been over it. all the crazy invitations to the silliest things...I just ignore them all. last month I went through and locked down all the features to the point where its really not doing much at all anymore.

Project Christopher said...

say what you want, but i tagged you for the 25 random things and by god you're going to do them or I'm going hunt down Dolly and cut her bazooms off!

Project Christopher said...

say what you want, but i tagged you for the 25 random things and by god you're going to do them or I'm going hunt down Dolly and cut her bazooms off!

Atari_Age said...

I want that T shirt sooo bad! Thanks for pointing it out.

I admit to using FB in somewhat self serving ways. But look at it this way: if you think FB status updates are bad, take a look at Twitter.

We're talking "I'm eating soup" here. Yeah, even with Ashton Kutcher

Aaron said...

Yeah, I think I finally gave in and did the "25 random things," but only because a few of my friends had done it, and they're usually rational people, so I figured it couldn't be TOO crazy. (I really only did it to share info with friends or to rant--I figure if anybody doesn't want to read it, that's what that not-clicking-on-the-link thing is for...)

Status updates are usually pretty fascinating to me, but bear in mind, I'm really fascinated by other people, and if they care to share, what the hell--it won't kill me. (I usually use my own status updates as a warning of what mood I'm in, so others can give me a wide berth...)

just me said...

When I started Facebook, I thought, oh, wow, this is cool, and then it got confusing, and then you had to have money to send shit to people, and then I thought right now "Debbie is looking at Facebook and trying to still figure the fucker out!" and now I try to avoid it... sometimes...like when I get an email about it...and I have to check it out!!

cb said...

Damn, but I DO love sarcastic fucking t-shirts!

Joe said...

Amen, Sister Friend! I'm with you 100%. If I wanted to know 25 random things about you I would actually ASK you!!

"Just David!" said...

i'm so ordering that shirt

Anonymous said...

How ironic, since your blog is basically a glorified status update, generally saying the same things over and over.

Robin fetish, how loenly you are, how your acting career is retarded childrens shows, and your sexual preference, which so far, seems short on sex with underage boys.

I guess if people can get their fix with facebook, it takes attention away from you. Waaa waaa.

Ruffy said...

You had me cracking up! Its all true!

RAD said...

not even one? Funny!!! :-)

Kristie said...

I actually did the 25 things, I found it kinda fun sorry I tagged you too. But I need to quit clicking on all those give me this or that and quit sending it to other people it's getting annoying. But I have enjoyed reconnecting with some old friends that's been fun