Friday, February 29, 2008

Fratboy Friday

A Leap Day Fratboy Friday.

Speaking of this being Leap Day, since this is an added extra day that only comes once every four years, why are working today? Shouldn't this be a massive holiday? A little bonus day for four years of services rendered? Ah well, let's not argue. Let's just look at the boys...


Nothing says "Welcome to the Weekend" quite like this picture.

When you are sitting in a locker room with your cap on backwards and your tongue sticking out, what exactly are you asking for me to do?

No wait, let me guess. So many possibilities....



Both of these boys are incredibly hot, but check out the one on the left.

I love it when suburban white boys try to pose all gangsta by slightly holding their junk in one hand and flashing a gang symbol / peace sign with the other. It's so adorable.

It's hard out here for a pimp, isn't it, sweetie?



Nothing like two friends relaxing at home with beer, popcorn and their asses hanging out of their shorts. Good times...



You know it's time to give "beer, bromance and buddy-to-buddy blowjobs" a try when you and your friends...

1) Strip completely naked on a public beach,

2) Demonstrate your mad sexual skills by publicly humping water bottles and,

3) Ensure that everyone sees your naked, water-bottle-humping asses by shouting into a megaphone, "Attention ladies, me and my buddies are naked and humping water bottles, yo!"

...and yet, not one woman in a 50 mile radius even glances in your direction.

I love the woman in the background. So blasé about three naked guys on a beach. Atta girl.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Snikt! Snikt!

Another hot picture of Hugh Jackman from the upcoming Wolverine movie.

This one I found over at Super Underwear Perverts.

Ray always has the best pics.

For instance, if you don't care for Jackman as Wolverine, perhaps you'd like a shirtless Jackman on the beach.

Snikt or no Snikt...

Shirt or no shirt...

With those abs, those guns, those pecs, that hairy chest and that grin, I'm in.

Hell, I even thought he was hot when he was playing Peter Allen.

Any man who can make a shirt made out of a pineapple print look sexy is my kind of guy.

Evildoers (and Moviegoers) Beware!

For better or worse, the Justice League of America movie is back on track and in pre-production.

Apparently, it was the writers' strike that caused the plug to be pulled months back and not the fact that this sounds like a really, really bad idea for a film.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for a Justice League movie, but to include Batman and Superman as characters and have them be played not by Christian Bale and Brandon Routh (respectively), but by new, relatively unknown actors seems a little too Catwoman with Halle Berry to me.

I mean, if you piss off the fanboys, exactly who do you expect to pay money to see your film?

That, added to the weight of introducing all of the other major characters on the team - - Wonder Woman, the Flash, Green Lantern, etc. - - and whatever villains are going to fight them and it sounds like a recipe for disaster. Superhero films weighed down by too many characters never really work (i.e. Batman & Robin, Spider-Man 3, etc.)

Maybe if they went this way with the script: A little Flash / Green Lantern sex scene.

Having sex with the Flash - - a man who can vibrate all of his molecules. Yum.

In the film, Flash is going to be played by Adrian Brody and the Green Lantern will be played by the rapper Common.

What do you think? Do y'all want to see Adrian and Common going at it?

I'd much rather see Brandon Routh and Christian Bale flip fucking.

Insert DC tagline / comic book title here...

"The Dynamic Duo."

"The Brave & the Bold."

I said "insert."


P.S. Sure, this pic looks less like Kal-El and Bruce Wayne are going at it and more like Superman is being bound by Wonder Woman's magic lasso while Black Adam gives him a tongue bath, but do you really care?

Yeah, neither do I.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Charlie Bit Me: The College Years

Ain't blogs grand?

Through the magic of links - - from my friend Kyle to me to Famous Like Me to Bill in Exile - - I find this cute / funny / hot version of Charlie Bit Me, performed by college boys.

The only problem I have is figuring out which one of these college boys I want more - - Charlie or his brother.

Silly me. I'll just have them both. A Stephen Sandwich, if you will.

My New Imaginary Boyfriend

I can feel it. Can you feel it?

Time for a New Imaginary Boyfriend.

Sure, I'm a fickle fuck, but it's cold and I'm grabbing at anything that will keep me warm.

And I have a feeling that good ole' Number 9 here will keep me warm. And then some.

Number 9 on his square cut trunks. Number 1 in my heart.

Now, let's see if I can unlace those... with my teeth.

Please, you know I can. I learned that trick in middle school.

Thanks to Speedo Junkie for introducing me to Mr. Perfect here.


This just in from Empire Magazine.

A new image of Hugh Jackman as Wolverine in the upcoming movie.

Is it me or have his claws... gotten longer... and wider?

This issue not only has Robert Downey, Jr. on the cover as Iron Man but it also has a new pic from the upcoming Hulk movie with Edward Norton.

Gay fanboy porn at its best.

Who needs the tights? Bring on the flesh!

TMI Tuesday

At work yesterday, I was getting out of my chair here at SOC and I realized I hadn't hit "send" on an email, so I turned my body in a certain way that it had not been turned since the Senior Prom and the next thing I knew, the left side of my lower back felt like it had been ripped in two.

Sidenote One: I can do the "legs over my shoulders" thing but it's the "scissor position with twist" that obviously screwed me up.

Sidenote Two: The Google image search I did for "back trouble" presented me with the pic to the right. It has nothing to do with me throwing my back out, but I just HAD to include it here. What happens in Eastern Europe, STAYS in Eastern Europe.

So, I was down for the count most of the day, went home after work and could barely move enough to put myself flat on my back in my bed to watch all of Justice League: The New Frontier.

(Which, by the way, rocked... except for the omission of The Losers / Dinosaur Island storyline. And huge chunks of the Challengers of the Unknown story not being used. Oh well, they did call it "Justice League: The New Frontier," not "The New Frontier")

So, as Dirk sometimes does, here is TMI Tuesday... on Wednesday!

1. What can you consider as the greatest thing you've ever done for/ to yourself?

Getting out of my last relationship.

It took me more than two years - - on and off - - and almost every therapy session I had during that time, but I got out of it. And as bad as it was, I learned a lot from it.

The best part is that I will never be in a relationship like that ever again. Period.

2. What/ Which part of your life you think you could have done better and why?

I don't think, I KNOW I could have been a better boyfriend to my first true love, the man I consider my first real boyfriend here in the city.

I've said it before but I was 25 and stupidly believed that career and art was more important than boyfriend, friends and family and I paid for it by losing my first true love.

As with #1, that will never happen again.

3. Do you have that one person whom you consider to be the wind beneath your wings?

This question alone is sentimental enough to make my jaded, cynical readers throw up in their mouths (I know I have jaded and cynical readers because - - shock - - I am jaded and cynical), but the "wind beneath my wings" is my mother.

From helping me move to Chicago to sending me care packages filled with homemade candy to always knowing exactly what I need when I need it, Mama has been there for me more times than I can count.

She has sacrificed so much so that I could have more than she had growing up. She gives freely without thinking. And she loves openly. I love and admire her.

4. Tell us about your longest relationship.

My longest was my worst. If it had lasted any longer, I would have killed him. Literally.

He should be glad that it didn't last any longer.

5. In a relationship, when do you get to that point of enough is enough?

Presently, I get to the point where "enough is enough" when I am disrespected, lied to or yelled at, no matter if we've been going out for 12 months or 12 minutes.

For instance, about two weeks into my last / worst relationship, we we getting into bed at his place one night and he started making advances for us to have sex. Now, we had had sex at least once a day (and most days twice a day, if not more) from the first night we slept together. This is two weeks in and he starts making the moves.

I said to him that I was tired and he made one of those "Awww..." sounds, like a child who was being told he couldn't play with his toy anymore tonight. So, I said that even though I was tired, I would have sex if he wanted to and that's when he slapped my hand away from him, turned his back on me in bed and said...
"Fuck you! You think I need a pity fuck from you?!? Fuck off!"

I got out of bed and started putting on my clothes. He asked, "Where the fuck do you think you're going?" and I told him home. And somehow, he talked me into getting back into bed, staying the night and having sex.

These days, just the slapping of my hand would end the relationship. Telling me to "Fuck off!" just two weeks in would ensure the relationship is over.

Bonus (as in optional):What is that one intimate moment with someone you miss so much and what are you willing to risk to have another moment of it. ;)

I miss kissing a lot. But I'm not willing to risk my self-esteem or my self-respect anymore to be kissed.

I'm waiting. And the right man will come along. And we will kiss and hug and make love. And he will never intentionally hurt me. And I will never intentionally hurt him.

And while I wait for him to come along, I'm not missing a damn thing by avoiding dates with men who would hurt me.

Been there. Done that. Bought all the show posters.

Good Morning

I felt like it was time for another Good Morning pic.

Hello, lovah.

Penny for your thoughts.

And twenty bucks if you'll move that sheet down so I can...


You get the idea...

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Will "Von Trapp" Ferrell

This is Will Ferrell last night on THE LATE SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN.

The part that made me laugh out loud while simultaneously saying to myself, "WTF?" starts at about the 3:00 mark.

This is how Will Ferrell leaves the Letterman show when he's promoting a basketball movie.

There are no words. Other than brilliant.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Backwoods Barbie & The New Frontier

Tomorrow is a big day for me in terms of new releases.

First up, there's Dolly Parton's new cd Backwoods Barbie.

Sure I already have two of the singles from this album on my iPod (You Better Get to Livin' and Jesus & Gravity), but I can't wait to own a Dolly Parton cd with a song entitled Shinola.

Shinola, y'all. Shinola.

And look at Ms. Dolly at age 62. Hotter than ever and sounding spectacular.

Also, tomorrow is the release date for DC Comics newest dvd - - the much anticipated movie version of Darwyn Cooke's award-winning graphic novel, Justice League: The New Frontier.

I can't wait!!

Of course, I might have to curb my spending a bit since I lost my cell phone last night somewhere either before, during or after Jeremy's kick-ass Oscar party.

If it doesn't turn up tonight, I'll have to give a nice chunk of change and a pound of flesh to Sprint. Those bastards.

A Three Ring Circus and a Train Wreck All in One

What could possibly be more bizarre than Tilda Swinton's Oscar gown from last night?

Tilda, I loved you in The Chronicles of Narnia, but seriously... sweetie... what's up with the one-sleeved velour dress?

Tilda's Academy Awards ensemble made me think that Christian's chocolate with black lace prom dress from PR4 really wasn't bad at all. And it was. Bad. Just like his hair.

No, the only thing more bizarre than Ms. Swinton's Oscar gown is this clip that my buddy Don just showed me.

This is Debbie Reynolds from sometime in the mid-60's singing If I Had a Hammer.

That's right, Princess Leia's mom sings a protest song. While sporting a beehive hairdo. And she has backup dancers. As one commenter said on YouTube...
"This is a three ring circus - - and a train wreck - - all in one."

Eat your heart out Peter, Paul and Mary.

P.S. Ms. Swinton made up for her odd appearance in her Oscar acceptance speech by mentioning George Clooney's Bat-suit from his one-time stint as The Dark Knight in Batman & Robin. Tilda said...

"Clooney, you know, the seriousness and the dedication to your art, seeing you climb into that rubber batsuit from Batman And Robin, the one with the nipples, every morning under your costume, on the set, off the set, hanging upside-down at lunch, you rock, man."

Perhaps Ms. Swinton was wearing Uma Thurman's Poison Ivy costume under that monstrosity.

One never knows. Do one?

Sunday, February 24, 2008

"Charlie Bit Me!" and "Hilary vs. Obama"

Two videos, each featuring two children. These children and these videos are funnier than anything currently being shown on CBS. Period.

Cute Kyle emailed this first clip to me and I've watched it so many times, I've probably doubled it's number of hits.

It's also the reason that I have been randomly calling Kyle at all hours of the day and simply saying "Charlie bit me!" in a British accent. I then hang up and laugh hysterically to myself.

Isn't that great?!? I love Charlie's expression after he bites his brother the second time. Laughing his ass off with a grin that says...

"You put your finger in my mouth and I'm gonna bite it, bitch!"

Then there's this vid that Mike over at Logopolis posted this a little while ago. As he said, this is...

"Hilary vs. Obama: The only debate that matters"

Friday, February 22, 2008

Fratboy Friday

A late Fratboy Friday today. I finally got all of that damn cold/flu bug that everyone has been getting and I've been laying around trying to sleep, not being able to and coughing like Camille.

But cute boys always cure a cold. And if they don't cure a cold, they definitely make suffering through it a Hell of a lot of more fun.

This will cure what ails you...


This candid snapshot of Travis' kick-ass, Boys Room rendition of Don't Cry for Me Argentina!

All I want is a guy with a cute smile, hot abs and a killer Patti LuPone impersonation.
Is that too much?



There's so much going on here.

The Hester Prynne "A." The Al Jolson blackface (WTF?). The megaphone that seems to represent the size and possibly the shape of his penis. (Conical. That's one I haven't had. Yet.).

Notice that everyone else in the picture is female, that everyone is white and apparently none of them are bothered by Mr. Hester's blackface bit. Offensive, twink-toned and Cult-like.

Jim Jones: The Next Generation. Friggin' frightening...



The guy on the right should be told that when you lay face down in bed with your butt exposed and you pretend to be passed out, you come across as a major slut who's way too easy.

You see, men love a challenge. Let the football team rip the shorts off you. And struggle a little when they hold you down. They'll believe they're in control, then.

Topping from the bottom. It's so much work, isn't it y'all?



Apparently, there is a popular game in college fraternities where the group is divided into two teams - - shirts and skins as you can see from the picture. The goal of each team is to find and pants a guy walking around campus wearing a Carol Channing wig.

Or is that a Blossom Dearie wig? No, it's a Nancy Grace wig? I'm intrigued...

Wouldn't it be great if we could walk up to Nancy Grace on the street and just yank her pants down? That might actually shut her up for 5 or 6 seconds. Oy...

Thursday, February 21, 2008

"This Shape Was Brilliant..."

Philip sent me the link to this clip in an email that simply said, "Maybe I love this."

I definitely love this.

Bravo James Blunt. I'm going to have to start watching Sesame Street again.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Wolverine, Meet Deadpool and Gambit

Check out who was just added to the upcoming prequel to the X-Men films , X-Men Origins: Wolverine.

First off, there's Mr. Abs of Death Ryan Reynolds who has been cast as Deadpool...

Then, there's Friday Night Lights hottie Taylor Kitsch who has been cast as Gambit...

Gambit. Always one of my favorites. Yum.

Add a little shirtless Jackman to the mix and I may have to be hosed down when I'm watching this movie on opening night.

Seth's Bar Mitzvah

This was featured on WGN-TV's Morning Show today and after watching it, I don't feel like being raised Southern Baptist was all that bad. Considering...

I give you Seth's Bar Mitzvah. From 1993.

"That's What Friends Are For," indeed.

Robin "R"

Look what I found.

Disregard the package, the peak of pubic hair, the hand casually, but deliberately entering said package, the small, yet chewable nipples and the erection that is just barely contained by the red "looks like licorice" g-string. If you can.

Check out the Robin "R" tattoo.

I wouldn't want the yellow, nor would I want a blue background, but that's the tat that I've slightly thought about getting.

I would just do the "R" in black. And this "R" with the points like from Tim Drake's Robin costume. Not the block letter "R" like the old Dick Grayson Robin.

What do you think? This and a Bat-Tramp Stamp might eternally define me as an uber-geek comic fanboy and never allow me to get laid again. Or would some men find it hot?

P.S. The Robin in the pic is packin'.

Tentacle Porn. WTF?

I walked by the Threadless store here in Chicago this past weekend and I saw this t-shirt.

I kind of need this.

Walking around with a little tentacle porn on my shirt would be hot.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

For Your Toybox

Just when you thought that movie marketing couldn't get any weirder / divinely fabulous, I give you this little gem from the 2008 Toy Fair going on right now in New York City...

Yep, it's Mr. Potato Head's "Taters of the Lost Ark"

Say what you will but it sure beats the Hell out of one of the other offerings at the Toy Fair...

Actually, I think I want to buy a set of these.

I could walk around IML without any leather on whatsoever, just have one of these babies on my hand and all those boys flagging red hankies in their right pockets would follow me around and insist I was the kinkiest MoFo in the hotel.

Which one could I use? Noah? Joseph? Goliath? Ooooo.... Goliath...

TMI Tuesday

It's a "day of the show, y'all" TMI Tuedsay.

1. Which one turns you on more Ink or piercing? Why?

I have to say Ink.

Something about it still says "dangerous" to me. Even though truly dangerous people like Dubya or Cheney don't have any ink - - at least not any we can see with their clothes on and I really don't want to think about what they look like with their clothes off - - there's something about someone with a tattoo that brings out the "I'm a good girl dating a bad boy" fantasy in me.

Makes me want to slap on a bouffant wig, jump into a poodle skirt and sing "He's a Rebel" or "Leader of the Pack."

Actually, seeing a man with a tattoo just makes me want to go up and lick it, but singing a good 60's girl group song is a strong second.

2. What ink do you have? If none, what would you get and and where?

I don't have any Ink current. I want to get a tat, but I just haven't made up my mind precisely what I want and where I want it.

Also, I know me and when I get my first tattoo, it will be followed up quickly by 50 more. I tend to go all out with certain things.

I've thought about getting a few black bands tattooed around my right forearm. Or I've thought of a series of black stars on my chest.

Or a cool, black Batman symbol on my lower back just over my ass. Sort of a Bat-Tramp Stamp, if you will.

The one fun tat I've thought about getting is a Robin "R" on my left pec, right where Robin's "R" is on his costume. Sort of like this boy's tattoo, but on the other side and replace the Superman symbol with the Robin "R".

When you take my fetish for Robin and combine it with my last name, it makes sense. A geeky, comic book loser sort of sense,
but still... P.S. That Superboy is hot.

3. What piercing do you have? If none, what would you get and and where?

I used to have my right eyebrow pierced with a simple hoop, but I looked at it one day after I had had it for about a year and said to myself, "You look ridiculous," and that was that.

4. Any other adornments you like to do for your lover or have them do for you?

Hang anything anywhere you want on me, yourself or any number of people, places or things. Whatever makes your bacon crisp, I'm all for it.

5. Of all of the above is there anything that is an immediate Turn-Off?

Insulting me or someone else about what they like sexually.

A few years ago, I ran into a guy who I see every so often and at each meeting, we always go on a few dates and realize that we're just not right for each other. But something always makes us forget that the next time we run into each other and the pattern starts all over again.

On this particular date, we went back to my place and in my bedroom - - after months of therapy with my therapist trying to convince me that I should say what I want in bed, no matter how kinky - - I opened on of my drawers and pulled out a bottle of poppers.

Now, on my kinky scale - - with 1 being vanilla and 10 being "He put the bowling ball where?!?" - - poppers are at about a negative 2. I mean, it's so nothing when compared to half the things I've done and the public places I've done them in.

But when I asked this man if he was into poppers, his response as he laid in my bed was...
"Poppers? What kind of 70's freak are you?"

To quote a lyric from The Light in the Piazza, "Thank you. We're done here. Not much to say" after that.

Bonus (as in optional): If money/work place rules/your life/whatever were not an issue, what ALL would you do to your body in the name of sexual or just general adornment?

I don't think I hold myself back from tats or piercings because of rules or money or societal pressure. I just can't make up my friggin' mind!!!

Big Wigs Live! Preview Party Tonight!

If you're in Chicago and you're bored with hibernating inside your house waiting for the 6 inches of ice barnacled to the sidewalk to melt, head over to the Crimson Lounge at the Hotel Sax tonight for a free - - yep, that's right FREE!! - - Preview Party for Big Wigs Live!, a huge new fundraiser for both Season of Concern and Equality Illinois.

And the best part of this Preview Party is not only will there be two live performance by some of the hottest drag queens in town, but also there is a Free Ten Cane Run Cocktail Hour from 6:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. I think it's a signature Ten Cane Rum cocktail that will be poured in your glass as many times as you want for that hour, so what's not to love about that?

The info from the Season of Concern site is below. If you're interested in goodies, we will be raffling off About Face Theatre tickets, Goodman tickets, restaurant certificates, at home massages, and we will be auctioning off some fabulous jewelry donated by my friend Cynthia Nash, as well as two tickets to the Chicago production of WICKED.

Oh, and Bloomingdale's just confirmed that they will be providing a little something for the gift bags we will be handing out to all those who purchase tickets to the Big Wigs Live! main event on June 23rd.

Yeah, we're fancy. We know. As Reba sings...

"I might have been born just plain white trash, but Fancy was my name!"

On June 23rd, acclaimed author Heather Haneman (a.k.a. Feather Handlesmen) and the fabulous dancers of BIG WIGS - Chicago's hot new drag performance company - will take the stage of the Vic Theater for the premiere of their much anticipated live show, but you won't have to wait that long if you join us on February 19th in the Crimson Lounge of Hotel Sax for the Big Wigs Live! VIP pre party!

Sponsored by Hotel Sax's (formerly the House Of Blues Hotel) Crimson Lounge, and Ten Cane Rum, all proceeds from the Big Wigs Live! pre party will benefit Season Of Concern and Equality Illinois.

And because her total fabulousness knows no bounds, Heather will also be donating 10% of the proceeds from all of the evening's sales of her debut book "
Big Wigs: Stories of a Straight Girl in a Drag Queen's World" to SOC and Equality Illinois!

Special guests slated to attend include national club icon Circuit MOM, Miss Kentucky Continental Plus 2007-2008 Mercedes, and Miss Continental Plus 2007 Tajma Hall!

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Bravo, Mr. Barkley

Knowing very little about sports in general and nothing at all about basketball in particular, I know nothing about Charles Barkley.

If asked about him before today, I probably would have said something like...
"He used to play that sport where you bounce the big, round balls, right?

"Or did he throw those leather, egg-shaped balls?

"Which sport is it where you have a big sing-a-long somewhere after intermission?

"That one's fun. Long, but fun."

I didn't really have an opinion about Charles Barkley one way or another. Until now.

Check out this clip from Mr. Barkley's interview on CNN...

I would almost move to Alabama if Mr. Barkely were governor. Almost.

My blood runs so Orange that those Bulldogs probably wouldn't allow me to cross the state line.

No Reason, It's Just Friggin' Hot

I saw this picture over at WetboxersGuy and I needed - - NEEDED - - to pass it on to all of you for No Reason, It's Just Friggin' Hot.

I think I love it because it reminds me of this bizarre-assed Wonder Woman cover...

...and this bizarre-assed, yet frighteninginly hot Detective Comics cover...

What is Robin covered in? Nevermind. Don't answer that. Let me dream for awhile.

Move Over 8-Track, I Got Me an iPod

Look what I finally bought, y'all. An iPod nano.

It's taken me so long to figure out which one I want, and when you add that to the fact that I didn't want to be one of "those people" who sit on the bus and aren't aware of their surroundings because their music is so friggin' loud, I just never could bring myself to buying something from Mr. Jobs that would be obsolete before I got it out of the store.

For instance, I know that when my buddy Mike bought his boyfriend Andy an iPod nano a few months ago, it didn't have video capability, so when I walked into BestBuy to buy my iPod nano yesterday, I asked for the video iPod nano.

My nice, red headed customer service guy said, "Yeah, they all have video capability," making me once again feel like the idiot at the I.T. table.

I should have said, "Well, they haven't ALWAYS had video capability in all of them, Carrot Top, so lighten up, alright?," but I was nice and swallowed my hatred for and envy of tech geeks.

Thank God Mike bought Andy an iPod nano because when I got the beautiful, black 2 inch screener home yesterday, I started it and the language was set to Chinese.

Chinese and two inches. Coincidence? Not at all, baby.

So, Andy had to talk me screen to screen until we found which Chinese characters meant "Languages" so I could change the thing back to English.

Now, I have to load the damn thing. Any suggestions on what songs I need to download from iTunes?

P.S. Tomorrow I buy my new computer.

Children's theatre may not be as sexy as working on the Goodman stage, but it definitely helps me buy new toys.

And these are toys I don't have to stash in the closet when my mother visits. Friggin' sweet.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Here's Your Sign

I just found this and I love it.

Not only can you write whatever you want and save the image, but there's also an option to order the Church sign you generated on everything from a magnet to a truck cap, from a t-shirt to a stein.

A friggin' stein. I love that.

Not that I ever use a stein. I'm strictly a vodka boy.

Vodka rocks. Hold the ice.

My (Imaginary) Boyfriend's Back

Love is very fickle thing.

Sure, I decided to go with a new, decidedly inked up Imaginary Boyfriend for '08, but John over at International Jock sent me a Valentine's Day picture of my Former Imaginary Boyfriend Adam and I can't help but flip flop back to the previous hottie.

Look at me. A flip flopper. Does that mean I'm versatile?

Or does it just make me the Mitt Romney of cyber homosexuality? I'm not Mormon and have no hair, but still...

Hmmm... I wonder... If Gay Marriage is legalized, will gay Mormons begin to take multiple life partners? And to gay men like myself, isn't that simply known as "Saturday?"

The tat boy, Adam and me together on a Saturday night sleeping triple in a double bed. I like it.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Can You Hear Me Now? HOT!

My friend Michael Pacas emailed this commercial to me a couple of days ago and I love it for reasons that will become extremely obvious when you reach the halfway point of the clip.

I've never been a big fan of clipping a phone to your ear and having everyone around you initially mistake you for a deranged schizophrenic whack job simply because you're talking out loud to, what appears to be, no one at all.

There is only one person who can turn a geeky tech gadget like a Bluetooth into a sultry, stylish, powerful, "goes with anything" accessory, and that is of course, Nichelle Nichols.

Ms. Nichols is so sexy, she can clip anything she wants anywhere she wants on any part of her fabulous body and we will not only declare it to be fashion, we will proclaim it to be art. Look at those earrings. Hot.

Nichelle should teach Bluetooth users how to wear their tech without giving up any chance of ever getting laid. When it comes to ear phone tech, Nichelle knows how to work it.

She knows EXACTLY how to wear the phone clip dangling from her ear so that it looks odd, foreign and slightly sexual at the same time. She knows how to gently touch the tech attached to her ear to indicate to everyone around her, "I'm on the phone now, bitch" without ever having to actually say it. And she knows PRECISELY how to cross her legs at the ankle when wearing her Star Fleet mini-mini-skirt while somehow continuing to keep her Hailing Frequencies OPEN.

Ms. Nichols is FIERCE!! And the Jawbone commercial is HOT!

I need me some Jawbone. And that tattooed man's phone number.

"Jane, What Is It You Can't Face?"

I'm sure everyone has already seen this by now, but below is a clip of Jane Fonda on The Today Show telling Meredith Viera her initial impressions of a certain monologue she was asked to perform from Eve Ensler's The Vagina Monologues.

If you've seen the play, you know the monologue she's talking about. The one whose title is a single word that can only be spoken by a Mother Superior when she's trying to solve a problem like Maria...
"Maria, what is it you cAUHn't face?"

Yeah, that word. But Jane doesn't dance around it like I just did. She lobs it right out into morning air. Like it's not a bad word at all. As if it's simply a word.

I know I sound like Alanis Morrissette, but isn't it ironic that the monologue Ms. Fonda is referring to is about shouting that forbidden word, that hurtful word; shouting it over and over until it's no longer frightening, until women reclaim the word.

Just like I claim the word Fag. I claim it for myself so that it can no longer be used to hurt me.

And while Jane Fonda may be able to shout the "C" word over and over, again and again in a crowded theatre behind a proscenium arch, saying it just once on national television makes that word "bad" again. It's no longer something you have reclaimed. Now, you have to apologize for it.

When are we as a nation going to grow up and realize that words can only harm us if we allow them to harm us?

As of today, three thousand, nine hundred and sixty U.S. soldiers have lost their lives fighting the War in Iraq, but not one single person ever died from hearing someone say, "See You Next Tuesday."

Fratboy Friday

If March 15th is "The Ides of March," then logic would suggest that February 15th is "The Ides of February."

Yet, "The Ides of February" is the 13th day of February, not the 15th.

I know what you're thinking...
"Who really gives a fuck? Unless you're Caesar. And it's March. And there's a soothsayer following you around. What's the friggin' point?"

Well, after reading that Ides fact, you can tell the I.T. guy at your office that you read Fratboy Friday for the fascinating cultural insights and information it provides to readers on a weekly basis.

The homo-erotic male nudity is beside the point. It's just there for filler.

Fratboy Friday:
Educating the masses one drunken, half-naked, pants-around-his-ankles college boy at a time.

Let's begin the lesson...

Just keep saying to yourself, Stephen...

"Soon, it will be July. Soon, the sand will replace snow. Soon, shirtless hotties will lay on the beach with six packs of beer and abs and offer both to you. "

Hey, it's my summer fantasy. I could happen...



Look at this boy. You could serve drinks off his ass.

And even if your drink fell from his "back shelf," you wouldn't mind having to lick the alcohol out from where the sun don't shine, would you?



Little Jack Horner sat in the corner,
Looking at several full moons
He put in both thumbs until they went numb,
And said, "Dude! Relax! I'm stuck!"

Dude, "Two Thumbs Up" is probably not the best way to rate a bunch of drunk mooners.
It looks like an invitation. I'm just sayin'...



Again, this is what would happen if a group of straight men had formed The Village People.

Can't Stop the Music seems like a better movie now, doesn't it?