Saturday, September 08, 2007

My Favorite Caption Contest Week #9

This week's entries were fewer, but as I say with regards to the men I sleep with, "Quality and not quantity."

Did anybody believe that?

Brilliant entries, but two really made me cackle. I mean, "cackle." You know, that crazy-assed, quasi-"Witchiepoo" laugh that I share with Paula Deen. Yeah, THAT cackle.

Well, it's tough deciding a winner between these two, but my First Runner-Up this week goes to my newfound blogger pal, Shirley Heezgay who submitted this brilliant caption...

"Wooden Crucifix: $7.95
Raver Whistle: $3.99
Backwards Vintage John Deere Cap: $9.99
Sight of dirty yellowed tube sock on your friend's non-existent penis:
You just saved about $4.95 at CVS on Ipecac Syrup
."

Brilliantly funny because it's TRUE!!! Come on - - Sock Boy's penis IS non-existent.

But once again this week, I have to crown Jer from "you're being ridiculous" as the winner for his Hollywood reference level...

"Ladies and Gentlemen...Harvey Weinstein has done it again.
This time with Weekend at Bernies III...
Bernie's back and this time he's GAY!"


Love it, Jer. LOVE IT!!!

I thought I would go back to a little category that I call "real-life superheroes" - - not because these ARE superheroes, but because they are real folks in bad, superhero garb. And like the sitcom blurbs always say, "Let the hilarity ensue!"

Here's the picture for My Favorite Caption Contest Week #9...


What IS that between The Flash's legs?


Did Lex Luthor snatch Kal-El's supersuit?

Or did he and Supes get dressed in the dark after a homo-Kryptonian bootycall and now Clark is walking around Metropolis in that purple and green, lame-assed battlesuit of Lex's?


When did the JLA pick up this random, lace-covered "God, I'm so DRUNK!," Groupie Girl whose eyes look like two piss holes in the snow?


And what happened to Aquaman? Did he EAT the rest of the Justice League or something? Swimmer's build? I don't think so...

And Aquaman's got brown hair now! And he's wearing it in a faux-hawk like he's one of us pickle-kissers or something! What the fuck is going on?!?


Lots to work with, right? Give 'em a caption, folks.

Deadline for possible captions is this Friday, September 14th at 5:00 p.m. (CST).

Since when did Aquaman start carrying around that Triton pitchfork thingy? And he's got a beer AND a cup? What? Aquaman's a "two-fister?" Geez...

12 comments:

jer said...

wow. this has kinda made my day...week. thanks.

Lance Noe said...

I didn't know Big Pussy from the soprano's was a superhero. That's cool!

Stephen Rader said...

Jer - You're sweet. You're the one with the funny as all get out captions! Hope I get to see you soon!

Lance - I don't know THE SOPRANO's at all (yeah, yeah, sue me), but any show with a character named "Big Pussy" is definitely one I will be watching on dvd VERY soon. :)

Shirley Heezgay said...

"The Geriatric Superhero Society's annual convention was only slightly marred by the hotel's double booking with the SFMA--Slutty French Maid Association."

Shirley Heezgay said...

Even better....!

"The presence of Lois Lane was ruining The Flash's plans for a superhero gangbang."

Stephen Rader said...

Shirley Heezgay - Okay, you do know that I love you, right? Cause I love me some Shirley Heezgay. I know you have a husband, so I'll will simply love you from afar, but tell your husband he's a lucky man!!! Brilliant captions!!

Eric said...

Being a Superhero used to be so much more exciting.

Stephen Rader said...

Eric - As usual, you're brilliant!! Who are you? And can I marry you? :)

Shirley Heezgay said...

just one more...

Photographer: "Okay, guys, let's take another one, but Stephen, do you mind tucking in your tampax string?"

Stephen Rader said...

Shirley Heezgay - I love you, but you ain't right!! You know you ain't right! :)

Shirley Heezgay said...

LOL!
you can change "Stephen" to "Shirley" if that makes it right!

have a great weekend!
x

Stephen Rader said...

Shirley - No name switch needed!!! It's damn funny and frighteningly true.