Saturday, September 29, 2007

All Things Dolly

I found this Dolly Parton quote in a new YouTube clip and I had to copy it down, because once again, Dolly tells it like it is!

"When I talk to a man, I can always tell what he's thinking by where he's looking.

"See, if he's lookin' at my eyes, he's lookin' for intelligence.


"If he's lookin' at my mouth, well he's lookin' for wit and wisdom.

"And if he's lookin' anywhere else except my chest, he's lookin' for another man."


****

Speaking of Dolly, a good friend of mine - - and frequent commenter here on ARE YOU THERE, BLOG? - - just landed a job at Dollywood for November and December that pays a much better salary than any other Equity contract that could be found in Chicago these days. Congratulations, my friend! I'm so happy for you and proud of you.

Not only does this mean that I'll (hopefully) get into the park for free when I'm back home for Christmas, but it also means that this gentleman and his partner have the good fortune (or bad luck) to be spending the holidays with my family!!!

What are the holidays like with my family?

Well, a few years ago when I was 40 pounds heavier, I walked into my aunt's Christmas Eve party and her first words to me were not "Merry Christmas" or "Welcome home!" No, her first words were...

"My Lord, you've gained weight!"

My mother, ever my champion, immediately countered with...

"Well, have you seen the jowls on your son?!?"

TENDER TENNESSEE CHRISTMAS, my ass!

6 comments:

Lance Noe said...

That pic is brilliant! simple brilliant!

Stephen Rader said...

Lance - Isn't it?!? I love it because it's so TRUE!!

Master Aaron said...

The holidays with Wanda and The Wandettes. That friend of yours should start a I've Been to Dolly, But I've Never Been to Me blog.

Stephen Rader said...

Master Aaron - You should... err... I mean, HE should DEFINITELY start a I'VE BEEN TO DOLLY, BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN TO ME blog. I LOVE that idea!!!

T$ said...

dolly is the bombdiggity.

have you seen her joke on the extras reel of the latest DVD release of 9 to 5?

if so...you know what's coming...if not...here's here joke:

"what's green and smells like miss piggy?"

--"kermit's finger."

Stephen Rader said...

t$ - I love that one!!! Dolly is indeed the bombdiggity!!!!! If I ever get to meet her, you better believe that's exactly what I'm gonna tell her!!!