Tuesday, September 02, 2008

TMI Tuesday

A post-Labor Day TMI Tuesday...

1. When was the last time someone hit on you? What went down?

What is with this question? Is it just TRYING to depress me?!?

I can't remember the last time someone hit on me. Well, that's not true. I do have a memory of someone very hot hitting on me, but it was quite awhile ago.

I was invited to a little "gathering" (a.k.a. "sex party") and I was having a bit of fun with the 3 or 4 fellas there, when the door opened and a new member joined the festivities.

He was hot. He was ripped. He was a porn star.

And he took one look at me and... well... you know that part in West Side Story where Tony and Maria see each other and everyone else in the room just fades into the background? And then they do that finger snap / twisty-knee bend dance?

Yeah. It was like that. Except the finger snap / twisty-knee bend dance was mind-numbing sex. At the end of which, he gave me his phone number in front of all of the other attendees and asked for me to call him.

Which I did. Frequently. Until he left town. Ah, the good old days...


2. If you were single and could be with any one person, who would it be (thinking singer/actor or someone famous here, but whatever)?

Again, you're depressing me. "If" I were single. Oy...

I'll answer this question as "if" if you were asking me which famous person I would want to be with (a.k.a. "fuck").

I'm going with Kerry Degman, My Imaginary Boyfriend.

Heeeee's dreeeeeaaaaamy...


3. Have you ever had done anything sexual in your office or your place of employment?

Not in my current office (though, I'm sure my predecessor did have sex here and I cleaned my desk accordingly), but in my former office? Hell to the Yeah!

I actually had sex in my old office with the porn star mentioned in Question #1.

How is it that I went from being Blanche Devereaux to Dorothy Zbornak in so short a time?


4. Do you apologize when you make a mistake? How do you react when someone calls you out?

Of course I apologize when I make a mistake. I'm such an Adult Child of an Alcoholic that I usually apologize when other people make a mistake or when other people intentionally hurt me. It's my way.

Yet, when someone calls me out, I tend to get pissed off. Someday soon, all of my Southern Training - - the stuff that keeps me polite and keeps my mouth in check - - is going to be completely drained away, and when that happens, I will begin to destroy those who call me out.

It is my hope to one day become Julia Sugarbaker.


5. Top or bottom?

Stop laughing. Some people might not know. And I can be versatile. I CAN!!!! It's not THAT funny!!!


Bonus (as in optional): Bonus: How old were you when you first had a willing sexual experience?

Since I define "sexual experience" as just about anything sexual...

...meaning that poles don't necessarily need to go into holes for me to call it sex...

...I was about 12 or 13.

Second cousins in the South. When they're a couple of years older and play football, you just can't beat that.

Pardon the pun.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love you, Stephen. So much, in fact, that I have decided to make no comment whatever. About "versatile." Kisses!

Biscuit said...

Good lord, I adore you. Are you in the market for a new best friend???

Polt said...

Wow...I wish my high school football team had THAT as their uniform! Or maybe just for practices...sure would have made the games more interesting!

HUGS...

Java said...

The older I get, the more of that Southern Training I lose. I find it much more challenging to keep my mouth in check. I have said some things that would shock Granny. And I don't give a fuck!

Anonymous said...

you know we're going to need to know who the porn star was.

Stephen R. said...

shirley - Well, I included his picture in this post - - the guy with the dreamy baby blue eyes. Do you know who that is? :)

Mike Ellis, The Jolly Reprobate said...

I love TMI Tuesday.

Is this some kind of group thing, or can anyone play?