Sunday, September 21, 2008

My New Favorite Caption Contest #35

There were some great captions submitted for last week's caption contest.  I think this little piece of "Redneck Heaven in a Ballcap" helped explain my love of tight-bodied, "Scattered, Smothered and Covered" Waffle House Southerners who shake Darwin's theories of evolution and natural selection to their very core.

The winning caption was once again the first caption submitted.  Mikey from The Gospel According to Mikey is incredibly cute and his caption had just enough of a callback to Dolly Parton's latest album that I had no choice but to make it the winning caption...

"Backwoods Ken: Sex appeal included, brains sold separately."

Mikey is so right - - this 2008 version of The Rifleman definitely has sex appeal. Sure, his family only recently evolved opposable thumbs, but he's sexy.  And packin'.

I chose this week's picture because of the sports fans bathed in orange, something I saw way too much of this past Friday evening as the UT Vols (my alma mater) were gearing up to play the Florida Gators on Saturday...

If I had seen one more "UT football" orange and white t-shirt with the words "My Blood Runs Deep Orange" emblazoned on the front, I would have gone postal by way of Deliverance.  And since I don't play the banjo and my parents are not cousins, I just can't pull that off.

But I'm better now.  And I can admire the shirtless boy in the center, even though he's surrounded by orange t-shirts, an orange "trace your hand and make a turkey" dude to his right (wtf?!?) and two Rum-Tum-Tugger looking orange stalkers directly behind him.  

Give 'em a caption.  Or help them find a word that ryhmes with "orange."  

14 comments:

Polt said...

"Once he was there, Sammy began to rethink the idea of using invisible orange ink."

That's all I got right now. Might have some more later.

HUGS...

cb said...

Goddamn it! Who do I have to BLOW to win a fucking caption title?!?

Stephen Rader said...

polt - Love it!!

cb - Ummm... ME!!!! Get down there, pack a lunch and stay for the day!! :)

kbronson said...

Joe decided to go see the football game before heading off to his production of "Equus"

Stephen Rader said...

kbronson - Okay, I love that caption because it's funny and it reminds me of Harry Potter naked and straddling a guy dressed like a horse. Nice. Very nice.

JimA said...

"I didn't have any orange paint, but I'm squeezing my oranges right now."

Stephen Rader said...

jima - Nice one! It's giving me a incredibly enjoyable mental picture. :)

philip said...

Orange you glad I didn't show banana?

Stephen Rader said...

philip - When you start writing jokes for the stars, you will remember me, won't you? Or maybe hire me as your very own bald Max the butler a la SUNSET BOULEVARD? Please? :)

Steve said...

Am I too late for the Cheetos orgy?

Polt said...

"Yeah, that's my hand print on his chest. For you to see where HIS handprint on me is, you gotta look a smidge lower...."

That's all for now.

HUGS...

kevin is the new shirley said...

"Let's see...rhymes with orange? oh, i know...Loser. Not all poetry rhymes, ya know."

Anatomicsd said...

"Honey, I'm orange from one end to the other. I'll let you decide from which end you want to start."

EMikeGarcia said...

I have no caption for Fred Savage, there... I did however want to say that...

I rock.

Thank you for the honor.