The questions are as old as time.
Who am I?
What made me the way I am?
What sparked the bizarre amalgamation of my likes, my dislikes, my fears, my passions?
Everyone asks these questions, but when I step back and examine all of these things in myself, I feel like some sort of show-tune-singing, redneck, homosexual version of Composite Superman.
As played by Yul Brenner.
Who else would freely admit that their favorite movie is Casablanca and that a close second is Smokey & the Bandit?
Did anyone else on the planet open up their iTunes this past weekend and purchase Madonna's Bond song Die Another Day, Amy Adams singing That's How You Know from Disney's Enchanted and the Barbara Mandrell classic I Was Country When Country Wasn't Cool? I highly friggin' doubt it.
And if you did, call me. I'm single, have plenty of oral experience and I'm willing to relocate.
But yesterday, I think I may have found a little piece of history that explains how one man can be a gay, white trash, musical theatre loving Trekkie with a serious Robin the Boy Wonder fetish.
My friend Michael Pacas emailed this clip to me yesterday and I haven't quite been the same since.
This is Minnie Pearl introducing Dean Jones and Ricardo Montalban singing Rhythm of Life from the musical Sweet Charity without the benefit of Bob Fosse choreography and surrounded by what looks to me like the chorus My Fair Lady on the set of Chess. I shit you not.
This is bizarre, fabulous, retina-burning, jaw-dropping, "What the fuck were they thinking?" tv camp and I love it. It's 100% me.