So true, it caused me to jump, gasp and then poke Philip several times throughout the film, as Dave Gibbons' comic panels came to life on the screen - - iconic images from the graphic novel were brilliantly chosen for the movie's storyboard, which sounds like an obvious choice... but...
Apparently, director Paul Greengrass was in pre-production for his version of Watchmen in 2005 and in his version, the time was moved up to present day and the Cold War was changed to the "war on terror." So, I imagine making a movie that stays true to the source material's art might not have been high on Mr. Greengrass' priority list.
Zack Snyder obviously loves the graphic novel and his direction deserves high praise. His cuts are smart, he condenses the story well, and - - believe it or not - - his changes, especially the ending, make the story better.
(And to you die hard fanboys enraged by my saying that, I've got one word for you - - "squid." A.k.a. "deus ex what the fuck?!?" You wouldn't prefer the squid, would you? Really? I mean... really?)
One thing, however, did not make sense. One thing frustrated me. Almost infuriated me.
Not on the screen, but in the audience.
Dr. Manhattan, in the graphic novel and in the movie, is naked throughout most of the story. Granted, some people might be a little shocked at seeing a blue, flaccid penis in a comic book movie, so the first time it's shown, I'll give everyone a pass... But...
Every time Dr. Manhattan's blue penis was seen on the screen (and mind you, these are NOT closeups), I could hear a few guys giggling, snickering and laughing.
I mean it. Why did they laugh that fucked up, frat boy laugh that seems to say, "Day-um, bro! I don't want to be seeing this"?
1) Immaturity? It's an R rated movie, so these weren't elementary school children. Why do grown men giggle at the sight of another man's "wee-wee"? It was like someone dropped their pants at "Show and Tell" with these guys.
2) Shock? Each one of these guys has a penis, right? It's not as if they saw some ridiculous, anaconda-like, piece of flesh hanging between another guys' legs for the first time and thought, "What the Hell IS THAT THING?!?" So, what's so damn funny about seeing a body part that you have on your very own body?
3) Awe? Were they dumbstruck by this particular penis' gigantic size? Nope. I mean, call me a size queen, but Dr. Manhattan's penis wasn't too big or too small, it was just right. (Besides, when I see a gigantic penis, I don't laugh. I might beg a little - - or a lot - - but I don't laugh)
3) Smurfiness? Yes, it's a blue penis, but that can't be what's making these guys laugh, can it? I've seen hundreds of penises of different shapes, sizes and yes, colors and not one of them caused me to giggle when I first looked at it. (Because that would be rude and frankly, miniatures don't make me laugh)
So, if these guys are penis-swinging grown men who don't laugh at The Smurfs, then I guess the giggles come from nervous laughter. Yep, that's right... I'm sayin' it...
Maybe, deep down, they want to touch, suck, lick or "take in" someone else's penis (blue or otherwise) and they can't allow that. Beause they're not gay. So, they laugh out loud. Because they assume that's what straight guys do.
I know, I know... It's far fetched to say that any guy who laughs over and over again at Dr. Manhattan's penis is gay, but it does make me ask the same question that popped into my head after the "wardrobe malfunction" at the Super Bowl a few years ago.
If seeing one nipple causes national chaos and seeing one penis causes grade school laughter, my question is...
When are we Americans going to grow the fuck up?