Saturday, March 28, 2009

"Brief Interviews with Hideous Men"

I am heading out the door to go to a birthday party for my friend, Clover.

Clover is a performance artist. And her Amazon Wish List intimidated the Hell out of me. 

All the "wish books" on Clover's list have titles that definitely sound smarter than a 5th grader, much less this redneck homo from public school. Titles that seem to say, "You must be THIS SMART to read this book." Writing so dense that merely skimming page one will cause you to feel as if you've taken three Lunesta, two Ambien, with tequila "in a pear tree."

Titles like "Art and Social Change: A Critical Reader." And "Teaching Community: A Pedagogy of Hope." I couldn't make it through those books. If you want me to read them, just hit me in the head with a two-by-four. It will have the same effect!

So, I chose this book as my gift for Clover: Brief Interviews with Hideous Men.

Because it describes most of my tricks, boyfriends and/or sexual partners.

The paper bag over the head is new. I've never done that to anyone I've slept with. Yet.


Prospero said...

Honey, you may not have, but you know that at least once, you wanted to. Though "Martini Myopathy* is best, because you don't realize they even need bags until after all is said and done. Sometimes it's just about gettin' some.

*Sounds so much better than 'Beer Goggles,' doesn't it? Let's a coin a new gay phrase!

Avenjer said...

Ha! I was re-watching the last season of "Sex and the city" tonight (I know, how sad but, that's me) and during the episode "lights, camera, relationship" which is the one where Samantha's Smith Jared goes full frontal in the play, Carrie takes Burger to Prada, etc. There is a scene with Carrie and Burger reading in bed and the THIS is the book he's reading. I guess that was some clever foreshadowing of what was to come. Not that he was hideous, just about to become the ex who broke up on a post-it. Which is pretty hideous. Ahh, this book just adds new depth to the whole thing. I miss that show and I need to get a life. :)

just me said...

I feel that way when I read some of the blogs I read....Like, damn, that was pretty damn brilliant, so damn, what am I going so say in my comment??? (This is an example)

McCool said...


Aaron said...

I think I talked to David Foster Wallace! Briefly.