World AIDS Day

I have thought a lot about what I want to say today, World AIDS Day, but the truth is that I could write and post pictures and links to web sites for the next 365 days and not communicate all that I feel about AIDS.

Its more than the sadness I feel about my friends who died too young and too quickly...

Its more than the hurt I feel when I speak about Season of Concern and remember their faces and their laughs...

Its more than the anger I feel when I see a picture of President Ronald Reagan, the leader I blame for killing my friends and loved ones. In 1981, there were 41 gay men dead from AIDS and because they were gay, nobody cared. Now 25 years later, there are 25 million dead from AIDS worldwide. In a country where bags of spinach making people sick gets monumental media coverage, Reagan and the press could have stopped this virus in the 80's and quite frankly, because it was killing fags, they didn't give a damn about it...

Its more than the confusion I feel when I see that since 1996, the AIDS death rate has decreased significantly because of protease inhibitors, but the HIV infection rate has not only remained the same, it has INCREASED, and still funding for prevention has been cut down to nothing (well, nothing or "Abstinence Only" programming, which of course means "nothing"). If there are more people living with HIV in our communities than ever before, don't we need MORE prevention, not less?...

Its more than the frustration I feel when I hear that a gay man in his 40's, when he heard that a friend of our's had recently died from AIDS-related illnesses, said "Oh, do people still die from that?"...

Its more than the happiness I feel when I did a Google image search in hope that there might be a picture of my friend and mentor, Lemmie Smith, who died from AIDS-related illnesses in 1993, and while I didn't find a picture of my friend, I DID find THIS picture of a man who is a sheriff in North Carolina who has Lemmie's EXACT same name (yep, its Lemmie's googleganger) and I know for a fact that Lemmie is laughing his ass off about this right now...

Its more than the pride I feel knowing that there are hundreds of theatre people giving speeches and collecting money for Season of Concern this weekend and throughout December, so that we can continue to provide direct care support to people living with HIV and AIDS throughout Chicago...

And its more than the joy I feel when I open up my email here at Season of Concern and see that the first person to make an online donation to SOC via our new web site is of course, my beautiful friend Alanda Coon, who reminded me with that one simple gesture that my friends who have passed on are still alive in the spirit and love I find in my friends who are still with me...

****

Tonight, as I attend a benefit performance for Season of Concern at the Steppenwolf and then rush off to my performance of UGLY BABY, I realize that my entire life has been shaped by knowing and learning from Lemmie Smith. Lemmie taught me how to be an actor...

"When everyone on stage with you is moving around, stand perfectly still. When everyone on stage with you is standing still, move around a little." - Lemmie Smith

"Focus is like loose change - - if its laying around, I'm gonna pick it up" - Lemmie Smith

...he was the first person to introduce me to Sondheim, it was at a theatre party he hosted that I met my first director and she invited me to my first ever audition for a play (GODSPELL - - I was cast and sang "All Good Gifts" thankyouverymuch) and he was a drag queen in the grand Southern tradition.

His drag name was Sylva Lamè. For his introduction, the emcee would say over the microphone, "Lades and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, the Theatrical Empress, Miss Sylva Lamè!!!" And borrowing from the old LONE RANGER television series, from the audience we would all shout...

"Hi ho, Sylva! Lamè!!!!!"

I love you, Lemmie and I miss you. Thank you for introducing me to such a beautiful life.