Thursday, November 09, 2006

What a Difference a Day Makes

In just a few days, Britney is divorcing K-Fed, Rumsfeld is finally on his way out and the Democrats have taken control of both the House AND the Senate...

I think we should all hold hands and sing that old Spiritual:

"Ding! Dong! The witch is dead!
Which old witch? The Wicked Witch!
Ding! Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead!"

For those of you who know my feelings about Stephen Schwartz's impotent and pathetic musical WICKED, check out the witty and well-scanned lyrics in the song above. Yip Harburg would not have written something as moronic as Schwartz's "Nessa...I've got something to confess-a." Hell, K-Fed raps a better rhyme than that!

And isn't it perfect that K-Fed's rap cd is all about how much money he has, the car he drives and the clothes he wears and now that Britney is leaving him, his next repeated phrase will be "Would you like Original or Extra Crispy." No...K-Fed is more of Popeye's Chicken guy - - not KFC. His phrase will be "Spicey or Mild?"

Isn't karma amazing?

...If you're a gay man who cheats on his wife, lies to his congregation and goes to the White House every Monday to condemn gay marriage, you get outed by your drug dealing, gay male prostitute.

...If you are a scumbag who works to protect children from internet sexual predators who secretly sends teenage boys IM's about taking off their boxers and rubbing one out, you get thrown into a spotlight so bright that you can't hide in any more dark corners with your laptop.

...If you date me, go through all of my personal possessions behind my back, lie about everything, sleep around with half the men on the northside and put my health at risk, and show up at my apartment drunk out of your mind time and time again being verbally and physically abusive, then you get fat.

New blog on blogger: Zero dollars.
Easily connecting self-hating, morally corrupt Republicans to your ex-boyfriend: Zero dollars.
Staying thin while your ex-boyfriend gets fatter and fatter: Priceless!

To George W: I know the perfect man to replace Rumsfeld. He resently served as your translator during the speech you gave on the 5th anniversary of 9/11:


Anonymous said...

It sucks I'm still living down here in Republican Hell GA.

But yea for the Dems maybe now something will get done.

Barack Obama 2008!!!!!


PunkAndy said...

Stephen, ive been reading,and enjoying, you blog sine you stated posting, but tonight-you made mr laugh out loud! thank you.

Bea said...

Stephen...great blog! Did you know that they had to GIVE away tickets to K-FED at HOB in chicago last night? The tickets printed say 0.00. Hilarious. Link me and I'll link you xoxo

Stephen said...

Kristi - I am the official Chicago homo stop for Leave The Red State Underground Railroad, so you are welcome in Blue Country anytime!

Andy - Thanks for the compliments and the laugh! That Little Richard clip is going to win another Emmy for THE DAILY SHOW!

Bea - Not to defend K-Fed, but I just heard from a friend that even La Streisand - - yes, Barbra herself!!! - - had to paper her second performance here in Chicago...of course she was at an ARENA and K-Fed was bascially performing in a small, studio apartment in Roger's Park, but still... And Bea, consider yourself LINKED!!! :)