"If I Could Only Fly"

I'm back.

Last night, I wrote half of a post about my vacation, the difficulty of being back in the South - - a place I love and yet, a place where I've never felt like I fit in.

I've always felt "other" there. Always.

But just now, a little girl on Oprah (a "mermaid girl," so watch your back Wendy Williams, because Oprah's bringin' back the crazy) brought up, out of the blue, that her parents are separated and in the process of getting a divorce.

The audience laughed. The father, though, said what every child of divorced parents wants to hear, regardless of their age - - that he and his wife had agreed to remain friends and that their daughter was the most important thing.

And then the mother looked at the daughter and said, "We're still what?," and the daughter said, "Ohana." The mother replied, "Always."

Oprah asked what it meant, and the little girl said...

"Ohana means family and family means no one gets left behind or forgotten."

Which is why I'm crying. Crying so hard. Because I love my family so much. And I wish I fit in more, was more like them.

But I also know, like this little girl knows, that my family won't ever leave me behind or forget me. Ever. No matter what I do or how different I am.

Yeah. It was one Hell of an emotional vacation. And I wish I was still there. So much.


P.S. If you don't know the song that shares the title of this post, listen to it. It's one of my favorite songs and explains exactly how I feel right now. And often.