For the record, I'm your gay angel Kelly.
I'd like to be your gay angel Jill, but my hair, even when I had more of it, simply will not feather.
And I'm sorry, but if you want me to be your gay angel Sabrina, you can lick my raw, blistered nutsack.
When I was a boy and we would play Charlie's Angels (Yes, I was THAT gay THAT early), I always had to be Sabrina. And I hated it. Why did I have to be the lesbian Angel?!?
And don't tell me that Sabrina wasn't a lesbian. Everybody knew Bri was a lesbian. Especially Charlie. Watch any episode from the first season and you'll hear Charlie say something like...
"Jill, you'll be a high-priced call girl. Kelly, you'll be a sophisticated, runway fashion model. And Sabrina, you're a truck driver. Sixteen wheeler."
Dyke. Through and through. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just that, as a little gay boy entering into a fantasy world of make-believe with my friends, the last thing I wanted to pretend to be was ANOTHER GAY PERSON!!! Can't I at least PRETEND that I'm straight? For a fucking afternoon?!? Oy...
So here I am. Your gay angel Kelly. Ready for action.