I have never been a fan of "American Idol."
I've tried to watch a few episodes, but that show, like "America's Got Talent," "Dancing with the Stars" and the rest of them, feels like "Circus of the Stars 2.0: The Legend of Curly's Gold" to me.
It was all done in the 70's and done badly. And here's America, 40 years later, feasting on something that tasted like mildewed dung almost half a century ago.
But, as I was doing laundry last night, my mother called me and told me about this girl, Vanessa Wolfe from Vonore, TN, and let me just say that this girl IS the South.
She is everything I love about the South, everything cute and simple and real and pure. She's sweet with a side of "cut you like a circle saw," and I cried a little and laughed a lot as I watched the full clip.
Maybe this is why people watch "American Idol," to find those people you connect with and root for them. Because if anybody deserves the best that this insane publicity machine of a Hollywood can provide, it's Vanessa.
And if they bring her all the way to Hollywood just to send her back to Vonore on a plane after singing one song, they won't have to worry about losing Simon next season. I'll take him out THIS season. And I'll leave them with Randy and Carla. Whoever the Hell THEY are.