Friday, December 04, 2009

"Another Chance to Disapprove, Another Brilliant Zinger!"

If I were a book, what book would I be? Well...

Nearly two years ago, "Book Quiz #1" identified me as Vladimir Nabokov's "Lolita."

Today, "Book Quiz #2" identifies me as the Holy Bible.

The juxtaposition would be funny if the descriptions weren't so eerily true.

Combine the two and I sound like an inappropriately sexual Elaine Stritch.

Again, eerily true...



You're The Bible!

by ?

One of the most controversial, misunderstood, and yet powerful people alive, you spark extensive discourse wherever you go. People think you hate a whole lot of things, and you probably do, but people forget about your hatred for shrimp. Mostly, you like to tell stories and then be overwhelmed by how many different ways people interpret the things you tell them. The older you are, the less forgiving you become. While few can argue you're trying to do good, most would say that you've wound up doing a good deal of ill. After all, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Maybe you should just beget while the begetting's good.


Take the Book Quiz II
at the Blue Pyramid.

8 comments:

Java said...

I like what this "Bible" thing says about you.

Stephen R. said...

Java - "Like" isn't quite the word I think of when I read that description and consider all that it says about me.

"Begrudgingly agree with"? Yes, but "Like"?... Only if I go back into therapy. And stay there for a few years. :)

Prospero said...

Jesus... I'm "The Martian Chronicles." Not really all that surprising, when I think about it...

cb said...

Please! No more photos of Elaine! My EYES!!!!

Anonymous said...

It seems reasonable to me. The bible is full of old men running after little girls... Even Mary was twelve...

I took the quiz and strangely it identified me as: The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde...

Isn't that such a queer result?

Java said...

The trick, Stephen, to reading the Bible (or reading about the Bible) is to only read the parts you like, and give those parts the spin to put you in the best possible light.

For instance, it's good to be "controversial (insert spin here), misunderstood (in a martyred way that makes you a sympathetic character), and yet powerful," to "spark extensive discourse wherever you go (about the things you want to spark extensive discourse (or spark other extensive things))." yada yada over the thing about hatred and shrimp... Oh, here's a good part: "you like to tell stories and then be overwhelmed by how many different ways people interpret the things you tell them." I don't know if you're becoming less forgiving as you get older, but that part applies to me in some ways, so I like it. "Few can argue that you're trying to do good..." and then leave the rest of that part out. And who wouldn't like to beget while the begetting's good? I mean really, since you are a beautifully gay man, the sex you have is unlikely to successfully "beget" anyone. The last time I heard of a pregnant man he still had girl parts left over from being born a girl. So for you to beget, you'll have to do it over and over again, practice like you're in the Olympics or something.

There now, isn't that better?

Stephen said...

I am FEAR & LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS!
"I mask my unhappiness with wild spirit".

I do look good in leggings & an oversized men's white shirt though.
"Sail Away".

Anonymous said...

I am Jane Eyre.