I'm back in Chicago and I have an important message for all Southerners:Pimento cheese is a hazardous material!
I'm not saying that pimento cheese is hazardous TO tighty-whities (in the Colon Blow way). I mean pimento cheese is hazardous LIKE tighty-whities.
Yes, the pimento cheese spread that my mother purchased at the Food Lion and then gave to me to take home (don't judge) is considered a "liquid or gel" by Homeland Security.
Pimento cheese + white bread =lunch.
Pimento cheese + Stephen =
"Danger! Queen with a Spread! DANGER!"
Knoxville Airport Security confiscated my pimento cheese spread, y'all! I'm lucky I got through with Mama's fried chicken!
I'm sorry, but if redneck boys can no longer travel with pimento cheese, Mama's fried chicken, a couple of Moon Pies and an RC coca-cola, the terrorists win!
9 comments:
hahahaha!!!!
Noooooooooooooooo!!
You know how easy it is to smuggle explosives in pimentos... Just be glad it wasn't Head Cheese... they'd have done a full-body cavity sear... oh. Nevermind. You probably would have enjoyed that too much! ;-)
What is it, a liquid, or a gel? That's too sad. Food Lion's pimiento cheese spread is some good stuff.
Did they let you on with an R'aC co'cola? I'd think that'd be a liquid, too, on most days. The moon pie should have passed muster, though. (Damn, boy, you got me all hungry again!)
Take "Queen with a Spread" out of context and it's even funnier.
What has this world come to?!?!
Sick sad world.
I think airport security has rather flipped out nowadays...I understand being concerned about unknown and possibly dangerous substances, but I mean, really?! CHEESE!??
On another note, I love your quote. I used to watch that movie over and over just for Yvonne Wilder. "De doctor says to me, 'Aurora, jou gotta get jou feet-a screpped!"
LOL!! The terrorists have already won, silly.
Knoxville is the worst. I got stopped there at 5:30am one morning because my exfoliating face cream was in a container that could hold 3.5 oz instead of 3.4. Yeah.
And, like your cheese, it was a present from my mama too.
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