Clay Aiken on Broadway: "Now THAT'S Faggy"

We all know Clay Gay-ken is a closet case...

...albeit a closet case with pretty hot taste in tricks, as my friend Mike's blog showed us back in '06...

...and we all know that his behavior borders on being Britney-esque...

...I mean, we ALL know what he did with this American Music Award when he got it home, don't we?...

...and we all know that I personally can't stand the drivel he passes as music to all the "Claymates"...

...or maybe we should call them "Gaymates" - - a much nicer term than what we've been calling them: "Middle Aged Fag Hags"...

...but now we know for a fact that Clay is a severe and pathetic dumbass.

This just in from the Associated Press...

NEW YORK---- Clay Aiken, who joins the cast of ''Monty Python's Spamalot'' this week, says its humor was initially lost on him.

''The first time I saw it I thought it was the stupidest thing I'd ever seen in my entire life,'' the ''American Idol'' runner-up told Newsweek.

''I thought Monty Python was a person until three months ago,'' Aiken told Newsweek.

Aiken plays one of the leads, Sir Robin, in the Tony Award-winning musical in a stint from Friday through May 4. He told the magazine he was so sore from rehearsals he ''couldn't even get off the toilet the other day.''

''It hurts so bad. I don't know if it's I'm not coordinated or using muscles I never had to use before,'' he said.


Yeah...

I guess when you've spent an entire evening shoving a set of billiard balls up your ass - - or as the Claymates refer to it, "Up his Clay-Hole" - - it's a little hard to get off the toilet.

I mean, how else can an impatient, pushy bottom like Clay get all those balls to come out?

And Clay, if it "hurts so bad" to dance standing up, why don't you try the combinations on your knees. You're used to being in that position for hours, right?

And as for thinking the show was "the stupidest thing" you'd ever seen in your life and believing that "Monty Python was a person," maybe it's ok to think that stuff, but when you get hired to work for those people, DON'T ADMIT IT IN PRINT!!

For awhile, I couldn't wait for the closet doors to swing open after you were found blowing George Michael in an LA bathroom, but now, after those incredibly stupid comments, I don't want you on our team.

Give back the shoes, bitch - - Dorothy isn't your friend anymore.

Of course, the straight people don't want you either. Although, I'll bet Mitt Romney would welcome you onto his team. He needs all the help he can get these days.

P.S. Does this photo frighten anyone else as much as it frightens me?

I'm not saying that homosexuality equals pedophilia, but that look on Clay's face... well... oh, Jesus...

Where the Hell is Chris Hanson when we need him?