TMI Tuesday

This week's TMI Tuesday says, "This is a tribute to the late great George Carlin." This should be fun.

1. What is your language pet peeve.

I despise - - truly and utterly despise - - when adults spell and/or change words as if they were 8 year old girls.

You know what I'm talking about. You're not "best friends," you're "besties."

"Whatever" becomes "whatevs." "Hot" becomes "hawt."

In the movie Arthur, Liza Minnelli says to Dudley Moore, "Don't be a lover, be a person."

So, to all my "besties" who think it's "hawt" to say "whatevs," I say...

"Don't be cute, be a person."

2. What is your favorite word? Both dirty and clean?

Okay. If this is truly a tribute to George Carlin, then there are no "dirty words" or "clean words." Words are words. Period.

If a word can be "dirty," then it can also be "bad." And I don't believe in bad words. Just bad people. And usually, it's bad people who are offended by and want to ban "bad words."

That said, my favorite word - - dirty or otherwise - - is COCKSUCKER. For so many reasons.


3. What is the one word you cannot spell?

Onomatopoeia.


4. What is the one word you always pronounce wrong?

"Lawyer." I'm not sure how I'm SUPPOSED to say it, but apparently, whenever I say "lawyer," I sound like Jeff Foxworthy telling a "You might be a redneck" joke.

Solution? I simply say, "Attorney." Blow me, bitch.
`

5. If you could erase one popular catchphrase from the English language, what would it be?

"Defying gravity." Erase the catchphrase, erase the song. Erase the friggin' show.

Every time an Elphaba sings that song, God kills a kitten. It's true.

Can you blame God? The song SUCKS!


Bonus (as in optional): The late, and very hot Michael Hutchence (INXS) once sang, "Words are weapons, sharper than knives" . What is the most hurtful thing you have ever said to anyone? Was it deliberate or accidental? What was the most hurtful thing ever said to you? Do you think it was deliberate or accidental?

Cher sings that "Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes." Not kill, they wound.

So, I prefer Cher's take on words as opposed to a guy who strangled himself while jacking off.

The most hurtful thing I ever said was when I screamed at my then boyfriend who was walking down my street with a trick, "Be careful if you fuck him, he gets around."

My then boyfriend turned around and said the most hurtful thing ever said to me...

"Why don't you go home and
put a knife to your throat."

This was just days after I had stayed up half the night with a knife to my wrist planning to end my life, mainly because of the disastrous, painful and destructive relationship I was in.

If only words were knives. If so, I would have killed that son of a bitch ages ago.

Well, this blog can't always be Sunshine, Lollipops and Rainbows, you know!