The Slut Meme

Polt over at Polt's Place has tagged me for "The Smut Meme."

My name and "smut" are synonymous. Who knew? Ok, everybody knew, but still...

This is a meme created by Isabella Snow and "The Smut Meme" rules are to link to her, to link to the person who tagged you and to tag two others.

In my experience, sex that has a lot of rules turns out to be a LOT of fun, so I'm game. And I've obeyed the rules Mistress Isabella. May I have another?

Thank you, Mistress! On with "The Smut Meme."

1. Chocolate or Whipped Cream? Whipped Cream, I'd say. It's a little stiffer and can adhere to certain shapes. And sizes.

Then again, there is chocolate Magic Shell.

You know, that stuff that pours over ice cream and hardens. That might be fun.

Pour it on when it's soft, get it hard and watch Mr. Happy "punch" out of it's encasement.

Lord, I need to get out more...

2. Leather or PVC? This picture should answer that question, but fair warning: If you don't want to see ALL of me, don't look.

3. Outdoor Sex or Indoor Sex? Anytime there's a chance to do it outdoors, I say GO FOR IT!! City or country, alley or valley - - outdoors brings the thrill of possibly being caught and the mind-blowing sensation of feeling the air and the world all around your naked body.

Just be mindful of the poison ivy.

And the cops.

And George Michael. He's always in the woods lookin' for a little somethin'-somethin', isn't he?

4. In the Jacuzzi or In Bed? I'm for more spice than sugar, so I say the Jacuzzi. Or the front porch. Or on top of the refrigerator. Utilize your space, that's my motto.

5. Bad Sex or No Sex? As my father is fond of saying, "Sex is like pizza. When it's good, it's great. And when it's bad, it's still pretty good."

6. Dominate or Be Dominated? Again, the picture in the link above will answer that. Although, I can be versatile when I want/need to be.

As my friend John Cardone once said about me being vers, "Sure Stephen, you're versatile. Spelled B-O-T-T-O-M."

7. Thigh highs or Bodystocking? Singlet. For obvious reasons.

8. Fast or Slow? Mix it up and take your time. This ain't a race, it's an adventure.

9. Rough or Gentle? See #8

10. Bite or Suck? Depends on the location. If we're talking about My Boys, it's the latter, but if it's Nipple Time, the former. Are clamps an option?

11. Role play or Reality? Role play. But be careful when you role play with an actor. We know how to get into and STAY into a scene. We commit to our role, baby. And you will LOVE IT!

12. Dirty Talking or Dirty Talking To? Both! To quote the play, AS IS, "Talking dirty makes it feel like Spring."

13. Edible panties or No Panties? Panties, boxers, tighty-whities or commando - - whatever gets your propeller spinning, I'm in.

14. Spanking paddle or Bare-handed? Whichever pleases you more, Sir. (Woohoo! I'm gonna get spanked! Yay!)

15. Landing Strip or Kojak? Looking at the top of my head doesn't answer that question for you? "Who loves you, baby?"

16. Multiple Sessions or One Good Fuck? Depends on the time available. Got the weekend? Let's go multiple. Got 10 minutes in the back of a cab? One good one!

17. Moaning or Screaming? Moaning AND screaming. And wailing. And begging. Let's give the neighbors something to talk about!!!

18. Older Men or Young Men? Older and younger and everything in between. I'm an Equal Opportunity Tramp.

19. Threeway or No Way? Threeway? Is that as big as the group can get? Let's fill the room and then send out for seconds.

20. Swing or No Swinging? Let's just say, too much of a good thing is grand!


And now I have to tag two people. Hmmmm....

When I tag people for these memes, I sometimes feel like I'm passing on a chain letter, so with that said, I lovingly choose Dirk over at Too Disgusting to Contemplate, Too Compelling to Ignore and my buddy Shirl over at Shirley Heezgay for this Smut Meme.

Not that they have to accept the tag and not that I find either of them smutty.

Although, I have had smut-filled fantasies featuring both of them. I'm just sayin...