TMI Tuesday

It's time for everybody's pre-Hump Day favorite - - TMI Tuesday. And this week's questions look like fun...


1. What is one thing a/your significant other could do to you to rock your world?

"Could do" or "should do?" Or "better do if they want me to keep laughing at their lame-assed jokes?"

Well, I don't want to cause too much of a scandal, so I'll just say...

A little stubble + A rim job = One Happy Stephen.

'Nuff said.

2. Which super power (ability to turn invisible, ability to read people's thoughts, or invulnerability) would you take and why?

Let's face it, I would take ANY super power I could get at this point!!

Well, maybe not super powers like the ones sported by The Legion of Substitute Heroes or anything (Color Kid, anyone? Arm Fall Off Boy? Come on...)

But I'd have to say that my dream super power has always been a slightly reformed version of Rogue's meta-abilities, where I would be able to not only read thoughts, but also steal memories, abilities and other people's super powers for a short time.

That way, you sort of get to do it all AND you get to be able to peer into people's minds.

I mean, I look like Professor X, I might as well have some of his abilities as well, right?

Also, a little of Jean Grey's telekinesis would be kick-ass!

And yes, I have my own Phoenix-like dark side, so don't fuck with me.

3. Would you rather be tied up or tie someone else up? Why?

These days, I would rather BE tied up.

Why? I tied people up for years. It's my turn now.

4. What is your best physical and non physical asset?

My best physical asset, I would have to say, is my head. Because wouldn't it be a bitch if God made me lose my hair AND gave me a crappily shaped head?!? Talk about bad karma.

My best non physical asset? I'd have to say my sense of humor. It sounds cliched but when you're the fat, gay kid in school, you're not exactly popular. Yet, when you realize that they will leave you alone and sometimes even think you're cool if you can make them laugh, your comedic skills improve rapidly.

But being funny isn't exactly great for your love life. I mean, nobody ever said...

"You're so damn funny! Now, lay back you hot stud!"

Nobody ever says that.

5. If they were naming new Dwarves beyond the seven what would your name be and why?

"Horny."

You need me to explain "why?" Really?

Bonus: What's the most embarrassing thing you ever bought?

As a Christmas gift for a friend a few years ago, I had to purchase the "Barry Manilow CD Boxed Set," and when I told the clerk - - the "clerk" being about 12 years old, dressed in full Goth black, inches of eye-liner, covered in tattoos of skulls, with purple, spiked hair and a dog-collar - - that it wasn't for me he said...

"Sure it isn't."

All I could think was...

"I look like a Fanilow.
Dear sweet, Jesus.
I LOOK LIKE A FANILOW!!!"