RITZ Pic

The revival of Terrance McNally's bathhouse farce, THE RITZ, doesn't open until October 11th, but a few production photos are circulating around.

So far, this one is my favorite...

On the left, that's Kevin Chamberlin who plays Gaetano Proclo. And on the right - - yep, we all want to know who that is on the right, don't we? - - that's Matthew Montelongo.

I know you'll find this hard to believe, but in THE RITZ, Matthew plays the role of "Patron in Chaps." Dear Lord, I wish I had that on my resume.

As you can see from the picture above...

A) Matthew is HOT and deserves a Tony Award. In that outfit, I could care less if he can "act." Honestly, in that outfit, I could care less if he can talk.

B) If you want an audience's attention, wear chaps, not a trench coat. Tim Gunn's list of 10 "Must Haves" for women may include a trench coat, but for men, chaps are definitely a top 5 "Must Have." (And by "chaps," I mean the clothing, not the cologne).

C) Anytime chaps are called for in a costume design plot, it's a REALLY GAY show. Think about it. What other show would you need guys in chaps? Hmmmm... I know of another one - - OKLAHOMA. See? That's a REALLY GAY show!!!

Break a leg on opening night, Kevin and Matthew.

Oh, and Matthew - - call me.

And Matthew - - one more thing. The next time you pose for production photos, move your hot package to the right or left of that railing / bar-thingy. It's blocking our view of your goods and that's NOT how you sell tickets, ok?